


Without Fear, There Can Be No Courage

by Amethystia



Category: Angel: the Series, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-18
Updated: 2014-06-17
Packaged: 2018-02-05 03:29:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1803640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amethystia/pseuds/Amethystia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She's not lost. She just doesn't know where to go. She wants her daughter back and she wants to be safe. She doesn't want to be surrounded by monsters, but they aren't going to stop her. The worst monsters she has known are very human and vampires have nothing on them. But being pregnant and plunged into a world full evil creatures, she could use some help. It's true what they say, for without fear there can be no courage and courage is something she's going to need a lot of if she wants to survive.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. You're Not Afraid?

**Author's Note:**

> Very AU, set around the middle of the series, when Connor is living by himself in that abandoned building.

"Oh fuck."

Someone was chasing her. Or maybe something. She couldn't see its face, but something about the stranger was very off-putting. Sometimes she could kind of... sense things. It was difficult to explain. And even if she'd tried, she was sure people would just think she was crazy. Which she probably was. She chanced a glance over her shoulder. The thing was gaining on her. Then all the sudden she was crashing into something. A dumpster, great. The alley she'd been chased down was a dead end. She was knocked off her feet and she twisted around to see her pursuer. He was closing in on her. She sat up on the ground facing him, her knees drawn up to her stomach.

"Well, look, a tasty treat!" The man said as he got nearer. She could see his face now. It was all bumpy and he had fangs.

"A vampire." She whispered, surprise coloring her tone. It caught the creature off guard too.

"How--" He started before he was cut off by being turned to dust. Some of the dust landed on the girl and she flinched in disgust. Now before her was a boy, not much younger than herself, holding a wooden stake and looking very intense. And handsome. She blinked at him.

"Thank you." She said, after a moment, her body trembling and her hands going to her stomach protectively. But her voice was surprisingly strong. The boy frowned.

"You're not afraid?" He asked. The girl managed a smile.

"Of course I'm afraid. A vampire just tried to drink my blood."

"How did you even know what it was?"

"It had fangs, what else would it be? Not that I've ever actually seen one before. My first vamp! How exciting!" She was babbling and she knew it. She tended to do that when she was nervous. The boy drew his eyebrows together, looking confused. But then he sighed and shook his head.

"Are you alright?" He asked, offering her his hand. She gratefully took it and he helped her to her feet. She brushed the dust off and caressed her stomach before answering.

"I think so." She said, then she gasped and collapsed, clutching her stomach. The boy caught her. But she was already unconscious. He sighed and swept her up bridal style, carrying her off into the night.

* * *

"Julia!"

The girl woke with a start, crying out the name. The boy rushed over to her.

"Are you okay?" He asked, sitting next to her. She noticed she was on a bed. She looked around. The room was shabby to say the least. There were candles everywhere, seemingly the only source of light. The boy looked concerned. She blinked up at him.

"Yeah." She said softly, hands once again going to her stomach. Taking a closer look, the boy noticed it was slightly swollen.

"Are you pregnant?" He asked. The girl looked defensive. 

"Yes." She sighed, her hands tenderly caressing her belly.

"Who's Julia?" He asked suddenly. The girl's head snapped up.

"Where did you hear that name?!" She cried. He looked confused.

"You said it as you were waking up." He elaborated.

"Did I?" She asked, looking forlorn.

"Yes."

"It's a bit of a long story."

"Well, maybe you could start with your name, and why you were in that alley." He said, making himself comfortable on the chair next to the bed.

"Only if you tell me your name first." The girl said, finally giving a tiny smile. The boy smiled too.

"I'm Connor." He said.

"Nice to meet you, Connor. And thanks again for saving me."

"Yes, yes, that's all well and good but who are you?"

"That's a complicated question." She answered with a sigh. The boy, Connor, raised his eyebrows.

"So start at the beginning?"

"Promise not to tell anyone?"

"I don't have anyone to tell." He assured her. She smiled tightly.

"Okay then..."

 


	2. I Guess You Can't Keep Running Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She tells her story for the first time ever. It's hard and a bit disjointed. Not helped at all by Connor's various interruptions and questions. But the picture comes together... eventually.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: This chapter mentions abuse, rape and other not so nice things.

"My name is Aliena. But it wasn't always. A long time ago, in a city far far away, I was called Jessie. It was the name I was born with. But I hate it now." The girl began. Connor frowned at her.

"Why did you change it?" He asked.

"Because I had to run away."

"Run away?"

"To protect Julia."

"Julia?

"My daughter."

"Is she..?" He indicated her stomach

"No. Julia's older than this little one. I don't even know if this one is a boy or a girl." She said, a little sadly.

"Then where is Julia?" He asked.

"She was taken from me. But for you to understand, I have to tell you the whole story."

"The whole story?"

"Yes." She confirmed. "It began when I was still Jessie. My life was different then. From the outside, it would of looked happy. But I wasn't really.

It was hard, then. Until I met him. He was the first one not to take advantage of me. To like me, to love me, for me, not for something I might have to offer. It was so new to me. We went so slowly, and it was okay. Okay for him, okay for me. It was beautiful and I loved every moment. The first time we made love it was completely consensual, something so new to me as well." She looked a little lost in thought for a moment.

"We only got to make love that once. He had to go away for a bit. I missed him terribly. But then I began to get sick. So I took a pregnancy test. It was positive. I had this horrible feeling wash over me then. A feeling that if she found out, my mother would kill it. Kill my child."

"Kill your child? Why? Didn't she love you?" Connor asked, very confused. Aliena shook her head.

"No. Did your mother love you?"

"I don't know. I never met her."

"She was a vampire, wasn't she?" Aliena asked with a frown. Connor looked stunned.

"Yes, how d--"

"I just know things sometimes." She cut him off. 

"Know things?"

"Yes, like that your father is also a vampire, but you had another father too... different... there's love there... but its strained... a teacher... but not a father..."

"How can you know those things?" Connor asked, shocked.

"I can feel them. See them in the air around you. It's hard to explain. Can I get back to me story now?"

"Uh, yeah, go ahead."

"So, knowing my mother would kill the baby, I made plans. Arrangements. Fake passport, papers, got some money. All under a new name. Aliena Estonia. Then I went to Florida, just before I began to show. She never knew where I was. No one did. I got a job, had Julia. I was comfortable.

Until I was jumped in an alley on my way home from work. Julia was at home with a babysitter. But the man who jumped me raped me and I barely made it home. The babysitter called 911 when she saw me. I was in a right state. I passed out before the ambulance got there. Woke up in a hospital, the babysitter asleep in the chair next to me with Julia on her lap. Julia was awake, and she launched herself into my arms when she saw I was okay. She was just two years old. After I recovered, we left for LA. But just a month after we arrived she was taken. I know she's still alive and I've been searching for her. I was following a lead when that vampire caught me. I just don't know what they want with my daughter." Aliena finished, nearly in tears.

"Do you have somewhere to stay?" Connor asked, concerned. Aliena shook her head.

"No, they burnt it down when they took her. I know she's still alive, I feel it." She added, knowing he would have doubts. But she didn't. She could feel her daughter's life, still bright in her mind, but dimming, as if she were hurt.

"Then you can stay here. And I will help you find your daughter." He announced. Aliena looked overjoyed as she flung her arms around him.

"Oh thank you! Thank you so much!" She crowed in his ear, hugging him tight.


End file.
